Reality: it is a criminal offence.
Reality: domestic abuse is about control within a relationship, regardless of sexual orientation. It can affect anyone.
Reality: when they’re not being violent, abusers are often charismatic, generous, playful, sensitive and exciting. It is the swings in behaviour that confuse and frighten the person being abused into staying in the relationship/home.
Reality: this is based on the idea that an abuser will feel more secure and confident in their relationship once they are married but often the opposite is true and the abuser becomes more suspicious and possessive and the level of violence increases.
Reality: children who witness or fear abuse display the same responses as children who experience it directly.
Reality: it can be extremely difficult to leave a controlling partner who has often undermined the self-belief and self-esteem of their partner, leaving them feeling isolated and struggling to make decisions. There are financial, social and emotional factors to consider and the point of separation can put victims and their children at increased risk. Besides, it’s not just leaving that’s difficult it’s the fear of what will happen next which is why it’s so important to realise you aren’t on your own.